Muller in Kosovo: Part Deux: I would NOT be surprised if I see a penguin...

Bbbbrrrrrrr......

Sorry, okay I have restored blood flow to my fingers and now I can type. I hope everyone back in the States is safe and has already traveled to their destination with friends or family. I sincerely hope that neither you or your loved ones got caught in the Midwest (Chicago) travel debacle I have been reading about. One good thing about being deployed overseas … no Holiday travel nightmares! Honestly though, I'd take two nights on the floor of Terminal 1 Concourse C at O'Hare if I got to spend Christmas with Katie...

I would like to request that Al Gore and his Nobel prize winning team of environmental scientists spend some time with us at Camp Bondsteel. I sincerely believe they will begin to doubt the notion of global warming. Please.... spare me the lectures about how global warming actually creates upper atmospheric instability with harsher weather conditions at both ends of the spectrum. I understand and accept most of the data/analysis. I'm just really freakin' cold right now and trying to make a joke, people!

Yesterday I stepped outside to use the bathroom (yes, I have to walk outside to get to the communal latrine) and was greeted by a row of icicles from hell. These things could easily be mounted on the business end of an M16 for a very effective (albeit short-lived) bayonet. I was careful not to close the door of my room too hard, so as to not dislodge these icy spears and impale some unsuspecting soldier wandering by.

I quintuple-layered and attempted a mad dash to the hospital. Again, I am struck by the intense feeling that I'm actually not a neuroradiologist from DC... but rather a psychotic scientific zealot who has lost control of my cognitive functions and moved above the Arctic Circle to carefully measure, chart and publish how fast the cracks in the polar icecap are widening. I really will not be surprised if I see a penguin wander past the TOC (Army acronym for the day, Tactical Operations Center). I just hope I'm not the one they choose to sit on their egg for three months. For those "Animal Planet" junkies in the crowd, I realize that penguins are indigenous to Antarctica and not the North Pole... But it's my story and you'll have to deal with it!

As we walked home from the dining facility that night (quickly I might add) we happened upon another distressing sight. There were some pathetic flowers from earlier this season still in their planters hanging from a balcony. Ice was growing off these things like a beard. Finally, as I walked down my balcony I was horrified to realize that the curiously large icicles from that morning had fathered millions of tiny icicle-lets of their own. In the name of all that is good and holy… the icicles have icicles! Where will the madness end? Hopefully not with a cataclysmic battle between good and evil.

I do have a warmer story though, particularly for you "animal planet" addicts. We have three working dogs here at Camp Bondsteel, all German shepherds. Two are trained for general patrol and narcotics (Allen and Zorby) and the third is specialty trained for explosives detection. I do not know his name yet, as I'll meet him on Thursday. I was interested to learn that they are issued socal security numbers, acrue rank and retire not unlike those of us that walk upright in uniform. Each year, they have to undergo a complete physical including radiographs.

SSG Shaw and SGT Brown (x-ray techs) with Allen

CPT Neal (veterinarian) positioning Allen with his handler

Allen taking a break

Despite being highly trained, these furry commandos will not hold still for x-rays and are briefly sedated for the procedure. We were happy to accommodate our veterinary colleagues and four legged comrades in the department of radiology.

Zorby having a "Propofol nap" and an elbow film

Posing with Allen before he wakes up from his "nap"

I was even asked to interpret and render a formal report on the plain films of the lumbar spine, hips and elbow joints. We were all sad to learn that Zorby had early osteoarthritis of the left hip which will likely result in an honorable discharge in the near future.

As I was completing Allen's films, I noticed something I do not ordinarily see on human studies. Initially I was amazed, but slowly began to feel this overwhelming sense of inadequacy.

You're the man Allan… there's no doubt about that.

Well, I guess I'll end there. Tomorrow (Christmas eve) I head out for more outpatient MR studies and will actually be performing an MR arthrogram on one of the MPs. That entails placing a needle under flouroscopy into the left shoulder joint and instilling a mixture of saline and contrast, followed by high resolution MR imaging. At night, we'll having a showing of "Love Actually" at the Hospital, the British Christmas time romantic comedy. Several of us plan to then attend the 23:00 candlelight service at the base chapel.